What The Hell Is Wrong With Me?

Lately, the tears come freely. I can pretty much turn them on at will. Sometimes they even come without notice. I’m not quite sure WHY this is happening, but most of the time it is pretty fucking friggin’ annoying. (Still on the curse word diet.) Maybe it is because Balla leaves soon on a 7 month journey to that ugly place they call the Middle East? I mean I seem to turn on the waterworks as soon as he walks out the door for a week underway period so it’s possible! Maybe it is because my children seem to be demanding constant entertainment this summer. More so than last year? So much so that I feel like I am constantly on the go during the day and when I finally stop, it’s dinner time, and I have forgotten to take something out of the freezer so we end up at some dumb restaurant which only makes the day even worse. But then maybe it is just stress because my brain is full and I never get enough sleep so I feel like shit crap all the time and the kids do nothing but whine and bitch complain and it seems like being at home just sucks without Balla and I know I am going to have to do it without him for 7 FRIGGIN’ MONTHS! AHHHHHHHHH! (BTW, I really am doing well on my diet...when I'm not so upset! I just use babies! Thanks Squirt!)


Yeah, see, I need therapy. But at least I can admit it. Isn’t that one of the 12 steps? Wait, I’m not trying to recover from anything except this perpetual hangover. Bleh. I don’t feel depressed, just extremely stressed out and anxious and it sucks. I need a break…alone…or with some highly intoxicated friends and a karaoke mic! Who’s coming with me and, well, where are we going?